Orlando, Fla.

A new study finds Florida ranks 32nd in its readiness to defend itself against a zombie attack compared to all 50 states, according to Estately, which also said Alaska was most likely to survive such an attack.

The study examined the number of active military personnel in a state, the number of military veterans, the number of physically active adults, martial arts students and teachers, the number of people with survival skills, the number of people with knowledge of zombies, laser tag and paintball enthusiasts, people with guns, obesity rates and triathletes.

Rounding out the top five are #2 Wyoming, #3 Colorado, #4 Idaho and #5 New Mexico.  The report noted Idaho’s inclusion because an abnormally high number of people there are into parkour and they are all well armed.

Bring up the bottom six are #45 Alabama, #46 Connecticut, #47 Georgia, #48 New York, #49 District of Columbia, #50 Mississippi and #51 in New Jersey.  It is presumed that everyone in those states is fat, stuck on their lazy-boy lounger with a TV remote control stuck in their hand and an endless soda fountain parked next to them, save for a few, but they moved away.

While Florida has a high number of active duty military personnel and veterans and a large gun ownership community, it is also largely a sedentary state with only moderate physical activity by residents who blame it on oppressively high heat and humidity during the summer months of April through November.  Despite the horrid conditions, the most activity most Floridians get is running from alligators and Skunk-ape.

Some odd conclusions according to the report and other media accounts show that the zombie apocalypse with most likely start in Florida and Delaware will become an island of survivors.

Wyoming will fare well because residents there already sit on their front porches with heavily armed shotguns, presumably waiting for zombie season.

Colorado is one of the most physically fit states in America and residents there will have already outran the slow walking dead corpse.

Arizona and Nevada will also fare well because they have annual training days and are home to zombie apocalypse stores, where residents can stock up.

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